Stress, Mess & Evolution

Getting Through Life’s Messy Moments with Strength and Growth

Life can be filled with unresolved emotions, attachments, and patterns that seem to hold us back. But within these challenges lies an invitation for growth and self-discovery.

Hey look, I totally get it if you just want to GET RID of old thoughts and emotions, and just blank them, numb them, or avoid them. But there’s a better way to transform those experiences into growth, wisdom, and true freedom.

You can only self soothe for so long until things really start to STINK. Awareness, looking lovingly, learning processes to process emotions, self-inquiry are all tools we can use so that we can learn transform roadblocks into stepping stones on the path to liberation.

 

Getting Through Emotional Patterns with Clarity

When we find ourselves stuck on something or someone from the past, the mind can easily replay memories, bringing emotions along for the ride. But we don’t have to stay caught up in those loops. Here’s how to start breaking free:

  • Notice the Pattern: The first step is noticing when these thoughts and feelings come up. This awareness alone is a small win because it allows us to interrupt the usual script.
  • Use Visualization to Let Go: Techniques like shrinking the image of a memory, making it black and white, or “pixelating” it can help. It sounds simple, but you’d be surprised at how effective this can be to take the emotional charge out of a memory.
  • Reconnect to What You Really Want: Often, we think it’s about that specific person or moment, but it’s actually the feeling we want. That’s the real insight—knowing you can recreate those positive feelings within yourself, no external validation needed.

Trusting Yourself to Handle It

One of the biggest things that holds us back is the idea that we’re somehow at the mercy of our own thoughts. But here’s the truth: you’re in the driver’s seat. It’s just a matter of trusting yourself to navigate.

  • Challenge Your Beliefs About Control: Remind yourself that thoughts don’t define you. You have them, but will you REALLY surrender to them, and do so with negative emotional conviction? NO! Rise up and challenge beliefs lovingly knowing that they are really there to protect you in some way. 
  • Empower Your Own Voice: The way you talk to yourself matters. If you’re always saying, “I can’t do this” or “I’ll never get over it,” you’re reinforcing those beliefs. Instead, flip the script. Choose words that affirm your strength and capability.
  • Make Time for Meditation and Reflection: Finding a moment each day to sit with yourself, notice your thoughts, and let them pass helps you build inner calm. You’ll feel more centered and more capable of handling whatever comes up.

Having a hard time achieving this? Book a call and experience it right away. 

From Futile to Empowered

From Overwhelm to Hope: Embracing Free Will and the Power of Emotional Release

When life feels like an unrelenting storm, it’s easy to feel trapped, thinking that freedom will only come if our circumstances change. Yet, real transformation doesn’t require altering the world around us; it calls for a shift within. True freedom comes from using our free will to change our internal state, even when everything around us seems difficult.

 
In a recent session, I witnessed the power of this shift firsthand. I worked with someone overwhelmed by stress, self-doubt, and a sense of helplessness, rooted in unresolved emotions. Together, we explored a way forward, not by avoiding these feelings, but by addressing and releasing them — and one particular exercise showed just how powerful this can be.

Processing Emotions Through Expression

Anger is an emotion that when unexpressed, can feel unheard, unseen and neglected. This in turn can AMPLIFY it as the message of anger is sometimes: An IMPORTANT value has been transgressed, a VOICE of HURT has been trampled on!

So I asked that part of her, in session, to write a letter. This wasn’t just any letter; it was an uncensored, raw expression of all the anger, resentment, and frustration she had been holding in. It was hard for her to allow herself to do it. So much shame around the anger came up, and that’s why working with a coach can be so helpful.

On the page, she poured out everything — the hidden pains and unmet expectations, even the sense of injustice and betrayal. It was really vital that she had the total freedom to be super petty if she needed to be. I’ve done this EXACT exercise multiple times. The letter is NEVER SENT to the person, because… it’s not about them.

She wrote everything she felt she couldn’t say, and in doing so, she created a space to let go of some of the heaviness.

What happened next was transformative. As she put down the anger, other feelings started to surface: care, compassion, and even forgiveness. It was as if releasing the negativity made room for her deeper, truer emotions. Beneath the anger lay a well of love and understanding she hadn’t expected to find, and with it came a sense of peace and hope.

The Truth About Free Will

Free will isn’t just about making big choices; it’s the ability to choose our inner responses. We may not control everything that happens to us, but we can choose how we want to experience it, who we are as we LIVE through it and how we live through it. 

Moving from despair to hope begins with recognizing that we are not passive players in our own lives. And OWNING that. We can acknowledge and process our feelings, and in doing so, create a path to a more peaceful state of being.

Here’s what the journey toward hope looks like:

  1. Pause and Acknowledge – Begin by noticing the feelings you’re experiencing, whether they are anger, sadness, or anxiety. Honor them without judgment.
  2. Express Without Holding Back – Find a way to release what you’re holding. Write a letter, journal, speak aloud, or do anything that lets you express yourself fully.
  3. Notice What Lies Beneath – When you let go of the anger or resentment, see what remains. Often, it’s a softer emotion — a love or understanding that brings peace.
  4. Choose a New Way Forward – With a clearer mind, you can decide how you want to move forward. Instead of focusing on what’s wrong, you might choose to focus on what’s possible.

In the end, transformation isn’t about waiting for circumstances to change. It’s about taking small, deliberate steps to process our emotions and make new choices. When we do this, we start to see that peace isn’t a distant goal; it’s a state we can cultivate within ourselves, no matter what.

Having a hard time achieving this? Book a call and experience it right away. 

Invisible Forces That Move Us

Uncovering Beliefs, Overcoming Disappointment, and Embracing Personal Growth

In the vast landscape of our lives, it is crucial to call upon the powers of mindfulness and self-awareness without judgment. In this space of openness, curiosity, and self-observation, we embark on a profound journey of exploration. Today, we gather to delve into the realm of invisible forces, to understand the intricacies that shape our actions and emotions.

Like wind that moves a tree, there are unseen forces that move us to act, not to act, to react or to sit in silence and observe. Sometimes we find ourselves behaving in harmful ways to ourselves or others, and we have no idea why. 

In those situations there can be unconscious programs that run our behavior. 

When we find ourselves instantly reacting to a situation, and we find ourselves in an emotional state like anger, but at the same time we don’t want to be, then we can see how we are being moved by something unseen. The most common thing to say is that the other person or the situation is causing the anger… but is it really true? Could it also be true that on some level, we are instantly perceiving the meaning of a situation, and also that that perception could be less than the full picture?

Beliefs, paradigms, identity, desire

Beliefs play a vital role in our lives, shaping our identity, behaviors, and perspectives on life. These invisible paradigms weave intricate webs that govern our thoughts and actions. Often, these beliefs are deeply ingrained, whispering what is true, what is possible, and who we are. We look out and see ‘reality’, but more often than not, we look out and see only a projection of beliefs that are often unquestioned. 

“We can’t solve the problem from within the consciousness that created the problem” – Einstein.

To transform, we need to move beyond concepts, beyond mind, beyond identifying ourselves as a ‘self’ that is consistent with the stories we have about who we are and the past.

It is essential to peel back the layers of our consciousness, to uncover the origins of these beliefs. By questioning their validity, we can challenge the limiting beliefs that hinder our growth and create new paradigms that align with our desires and aspirations.

Amidst the cacophony of external expectations and societal pressures, we must strive to reconnect with our authentic desires. Society often imposes limitations and suppresses our innermost longings. But within the whispers of our soul lies a map leading to joy, purpose, and fulfillment. In the stillness of introspection, we allow ourselves to hear those whispers and embrace the beauty of our authentic desires.

"I struggled with clarity for too long. I thought I was clear, but actually I had no idea what real clarity was. Now I have true understanding of what really moves me. Book a session with Matt and you'll find your clarity"
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"A deep seated shame was affecting me, it was affecting my marriage, it was affecting how I treated people... Matt helped me heal the shamefulness, and what lay underneath was TRULY AMAZING... now I'm watching myself become fully alive"
Click & Book a Free Session

Overwhelm is not a sign of weakness, but an invitation for growth.

It is a journey that requires courage and a willingness to face discomfort. We must shed the fear of disappointment and the weight of societal judgment. As we unearth our authentic desires, we unlock the transformative power of a purpose-driven life. We discover the extraordinary within the ordinary and embark on a path that aligns our actions with our deepest desires.

Much of the strategies we have put on autopilot to navigate life were from a time where those strategies were the best we came up with. Many of our unconscious behaviors date back to early childhood. The brain is an incredible store house and machine built to serve us. Even what we often perceive as harmful behaviors are there to protect and serve us… if we have the courage to sit and stillness to listen.

The good news is, we have the power to transcend limitations, to liberate ourselves from unconsciousness, and to create a life filled with purpose, fulfillment, and abundant growth.

That the journey of personal transformation is not linear nor without challenges. It is a continuous process of self-reflection, introspection, and conscious choice. By understanding the unseen forces that shape our lives, we empower ourselves to navigate through the complexities of existence with grace and resilience.

If you’re ready, it would be my honor to help. The journey begins with one free call. You will be amazed what can happen in a short period of time. https://bit.ly/3P3VPRG

Inner Transformational Odyssey

INner Transformational odyssey

  • Matthew Corlett
  • Jan 22, 2022

In this vast expanse of existence, you are much more than a speck in the cosmos. You are a confluence of energy, a synthesis of experiences, and a vessel of profound potential. An expression and a witness of the one consciousness that creates all things.

True, we find ourselves besieged by life’s myriad trials – anxiety, overwhelm, tumultuous relationships, and the ceaseless grind of overwork partly inspired by the constant stimuli provided by technology and addiction.

The challenges for awakening are not only those of our ‘outer’ circumstances (including other people), but almost always our inner reality, our thinking, our mind, our perceptions, our identification with things.

Yet, within us lies an untapped reservoir of resilience and inner wisdom. If these words echo within you, perhaps it’s time to traverse the pathway inward, to find liberation, fulfillment, and love that exists in the quiet spaces of your own heart.

With these words, we pose the question: are you ready to embark on this transformational journey towards inner peace and spiritual awakening?

We believe and behave as if the world shapes our perception, casting long shadows upon the canvas of our minds. In part it does, as we usually identify ourselves through the outer world. What if we dared to step beyond this shadowplay, to question if what we perceive as reality is indeed a passive reception… or an active creation? By acknowledging that our perception is but one of myriad realities.

Zoom out… Envision a cosmic web that connects us all – an intricate tapestry binding us to everything that is, was, and ever will be. Embracing this interconnectedness allows us a glimpse of the self’s expansiveness, revealing an essence that transcends the illusion of separation. As you awaken to this unity, a profound sense of belonging and inner peace envelops you.

In this journey of self-discovery, let presence be your compass. Allow it to guide you through the emotional landscapes and turbulent experiences. View them not as foes to conquer, but as currents in the river of life that carry you towards your destination. Beneath the choppy surface of these waves, an unstoppable force of creation lies – from the heart of stillness found only in the present moment.

You are more than your thoughts, beliefs, and experiences. You have the capacity to transcend these boundaries and dive into the profound depth of your being. This odyssey within demands courage, an open heart, and the readiness to embrace change. And… the possibilities for growth and understanding it yields are boundless.

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"Before I met Matt, I was struggling deeply with anxiety. It was keeping me from the deep intimacy I now realize I needed most. With presence and compassion, he helped me be liberated from the past, so I could really create a wonderful life of purpose and meaning NOW"
M. Volpe
Business Owner, Married Father of 2
In Stillness, resides a seeing, a sensing, a knowing far beyond what the identified mind is capable of. In this space, answers to problems are incredibly wise, and it's all there within
Matt Corlett

Rebirth or Born Anew?

Reincarnation of thought as you

So many of us took on at a young age beliefs like, “I can’t disappoint anybody (or I’m dead meat). I can’t be disappointed in people I love or something is wrong with me!” “I have to heal my mom/dad. I have to help them be well! Their suffering is my problem!”
 
I’m not saying it’s rational or even that it was formulated in clear statements like that. Research might argue the opposite, that those worded concepts are representations of emotional, vibrational, energetic, felt experiences. Those form neurological networks that produce specific hormonal concoctions, nervous system responses, even genetic expression… all run by unconscious processes… they can become habit of mind/behavior. Automated.
 
In my experience, habit of mind masquerades as law of the universe. This IS the way it IS. And it is, unless we interrupt the pattern, the habit… or it gets so harsh we are brought to our knees and either numb it out or head in.
 
I often marvel at my automatic responses in some situations. Awareness is a blessing. Pain too if it is required to get my awareness. It really is the wedge that provides necessary distance to transform, to loosen the claim of reality that habits of mind can have over me, and reveal opportunities and alternatives.

The gift of Pain; the gift of awareness; the gift of the conscious mind

Awareness is just the beginning of something beautiful. As I become aware, I notice how often I’m not actually responding to the current situation, but repeating an echo of the past.
 
Reincarnation of thoughts, beliefs, living through me. Again and again, until… their cycle of reincarnation end in me, no longer pathways for their expression to live through ‘me’.
 
And it’s not so conscious. It arises before the conscious mind notices. It’s there.
 
Today a wonderful thing happened with a client that showed me again, that awareness as a practice, bringing presence to reactions that are difficult to sit with, sitting with them regardless of that pain, developing understanding and really listening… sometimes bringing paradoxical tools to the same issue… how this can result in new breakthrough realizations, opportunity for choice, even empowering responses to situations in the PRESENT.
 
Moving from helpless effect to co-creator.
"I struggled with clarity for too long. I thought I was clear, but actually I had no idea what real clarity was. Now I have true understanding of what really moves me. Book a session with Matt and you'll find your clarity"
Click To Book Free Strategy Session
"A deep seated shame was affecting me, it was affecting my marriage, it was affecting how I treated people... Matt helped me heal the shamefulness, and what lay underneath was TRULY AMAZING... now I'm watching myself become fully alive"
Click & Book a Free Session

Born anew not reborn

“Matt… I am not going to solve this pain I have by solving THEIR problems. That is a pattern that is killing me. I’m always trying to make everyone else OK, trying to anticipate and control everything so I can finally feel safe… like it’s safe to finally be able to just be me, and be seen and supported… but I never feel safe doing that, and nobody really sees me. I usually end up exhausted and resenting myself.”
 
I recognized me in that too. “To be safe… I can’t be authentic… it will ruin all opportunity for attachment… I must please first even if it means damaging myself in the process.”
 

The desire for safety, authenticity and to be loved has sanctity. With the awareness of the unquestioned beliefs of HOW to get it, she understood she has options. And options she chose… creating safety in herself, and allowing the universe to respond to her new demand.

Rebirth? or Born Anew?

And in that moment, the automatic response she had learned long ago, started to lose it’s universal authority. No longer automatic, new alternatives were born from within, tied to the present, and she found an opportunity to build exactly the safety and vulnerability she desired without needing to wait for circumstances to ‘finally’ align and allow it. Without needing to take responsibility for everyone and everything else first.
 
It might seem so obvious to some, but those habits of mind… they can be really subtle. And when I reflect on the profound and beautiful breakthrough she had… well… I feel a wave of love wash over me.
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Presence & Transformation

Presence opens doors to healing where healing means becoming whole

The more presence I can bring to a feeling, the more I can sit with it without agenda – without the drive to kill it, change it, or ‘just get rid of it’, to hate it, judge it, feel ashamed of it, or just want it GONE – the more understanding and compassion and healing is possible.

What happens when you feel heard, seen, witnessed and there’s no pressure on you to change or modify anything? Have you had that? Where a person just holds space? I relax. I trust. I get calmer. I open. I start to shift.

Consider this analogy

If you were sitting at work, and your boss came in and she SCREAMED at you, “What the fuck is this shit? This is such garbage I can’t even BELIEVE you would submit this? You are a fucking embarrassment, I hate you and want you OUT OF MY FUCKING COMPANY NOW!”  – then through a report at you and stormed away, would you have any understanding of what the hell just happened? Assuming of course you were exerting reasonable to excellent effort to do well, and not like… stealing or something. 

If you are a boss, and you went into an employee’s office and did that, would you expect them to know what you were talking about? 

Yet so often, we have a behavior, or a feeling like loneliness, sadness, anger, frustration, resentment, anxiety… but we act like that bad boss. What if that FEELING was actually a very EARNEST employee looking to serve you? In this case, fire that emotion all you want, it won’t go anywhere… more likely it will double down. Drown it in booze, numb it with sex or Netflix… it’ll be there, after the drugs wear off.

Take a paradoxical approach

What happens when I bring that same presence to feelings? To attitudes, behaviours or even beliefs I can’t seem to ‘shake’? What if I approach them with the intent just to hold space, maybe with some awareness, curiosity and the intention to understand.

Well, they soften. They calm. And the opportunity for understanding starts to present itself. They speak to me, and even answer my questions. 

This is healing. No longer a victim to your emotions, you become the unifying factor, the one who brings their higher intentions to light, who reveals the insights they have for your betterment, growth and success.

Sometimes presence, awareness without agenda, is enough to open the door to new understanding, growth and transformation. A part of alchemy – of turning hell into heaven.

Having a hard time achieving this? Book a call and experience it right away. 

Awareness Short Video

awareness is the foundation of all awakening and transformation

Awareness is simple. It is also foundational to meaningful healing. This is an easy to follow introduction to practicing awareness. You may be surprised how effortless it is just to bring your awareness to thought. Again, this is a simple introduction that will take under 10 minutes.

No need to judge, shame, blame or even try to get rid of thought

Normally we are assenting to our thoughts, beliefs and concepts without knowing what they are, or how they are effecting us physically, mentally, emotionally and even karmically. Awareness helps us become calm, offers more clarity, allows us to perceive and learn, to build understanding and eventually choice.

Sometimes it’s by becoming aware of our body, our emotions, our focus, our breath that the causal thoughts then avail themselves to us. Other times, we are able to become of aware of our thoughts, then become aware of how those thoughts are impacting our lives when we believe or act as if, they are true. Either way is of benefit.

The unedited, uncut, rawness of this video is INTENTIONAL. It is meant to break form from high production. The rawness of it can evoke just as a well produced video can evoke. It is the candid nature of this video that offers you a launching pad for the practice of awareness.

This is not about self help, changing your mind, silencing your thought, or to get you to aspire to a lifestyle. This is about awareness, for it is awareness that acts as a foundation for transformation. It just may be true that we never respond to the way things are, but to our concepts of the way things are, and that we may only ever have concepts of the way things are. Awareness is the foundation of all awakening, and it is simple to begin now.

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What Can Awareness Do?

can you let go, forgive, and find beauty?

  • Matthew Corlett
  • Jan 22, 2022

I would like to take a moment to share with you the power of awareness. It is a super power, and lucky for you, you’ve got it! You are using it ALL the time and in fact, ‘you’ might even be the expression of it. 

Let’s keep it really simple. Imagine for a moment you are angry. You might not even know why, but you find yourself pissed off.

Maybe it’s some work you have to get done that you’d rather not do, or your teenager is ‘making everything impossible’. 

You might say to yourself or someone else, “Fuck! I am so angry right now because I always have to do this stupid work I hate!” Your conscious awareness of thoughts might end there, but there is always more assumed under the loud voice. 

If I came along and recommended bringing awareness to it, you might say, “Hey A-hole I’m already totally aware of what a disrespectful, hormonal teenager I have that continues to push me to insanity!” 

But this is not awareness. This is judgement and assumption. Also superpowers mind you, but not like awareness.

It is unquestioning belief of thoughts that are circling around, quietly and loudly, in your consciousness, and it is feeling as if your emotions are inevitable, or a natural result of reality.

The simple formula: my thoughts are true, I am my emotions. You are wholly identified with your feelings, and focused on the problem that caused it. 

It might even seem logical. How else could you, would you, should you feel right? Of course. My thoughts are true, I feel this way because of this problem. End of story. 1+2=3.

Or is it?  

Pause, become aware, be open

Awareness is a practice. It is a way for you to observe yourself from a new vantage point without shame, judgement, criticism or blame. 

Awareness creates a wedge between your thoughts, your feelings, and ‘you’ (and that is a topic for another space, that ‘you’). 

To practice awareness, curiosity and courage are your allies. Are you ready to get curious about you? Do you have the courage to take total responsibility for your emotions and well being? 

Do you have 10 seconds? 

Put your hand on your heart, close your eyes so that the input of your present circumstances are closed out of you mind for a moment. 

Take notice of your body. Without saying you are ‘angry’, notice your posture, your breath, your shoulders, the position of your head. Tune into your muscles of your face, your neck. If you’re an empath, feel into the deeper vibrations of your physical being. 

If you’re interested on how to do that, book a call and we’ll get you started. 

Observe and take note. My face is so strained, my heart beat is racing, I feel like I’m choking on something, my breath is shallow, there is a lot of pressure building up in my scalp, my stomach is in knots and my fists are clenched.

This is one step of awareness, to become aware of the physiology of your anger. Not that you need to get rid of the anger, or change it, but if you did want to pause it, with practice you just change your physiology, and it’s impossible for anger to take grip. 

As you observe more, you start to become the observer. As you identify more and more as the observer, you will naturally find a different sensation growing in you. 

Now it’s time to bring your awareness to the things you are focused on. “I’m focused on my son, his behavior. I feel powerless and frustrated. I feel like a failure as a dad. He doesn’t respect me and really I am weak and stupid. I hate him but I feel so sad that I failed as a parent”

It can get ugly in there. Again, observe, bring your awareness without criticism shame or blame. Really just become aware of your focus, the thoughts you are thinking, and the language you are using in your mind. 

All of this combined is creating meaning, which means creating reality. Painful things happen, but suffering is the result of the meaning we give them.  

Notice how it feels in your body to have those thoughts, to hold that focus, and notice other ideas and words that arise when you believe the thoughts are true. 

If you cant go further, ask yourself this powerful question: Who am I when I believe these thoughts are true? 

You might hear, “I am sad, lonely, and upset. I feel let down by my parents because they really mistreated me, and I never wanted my son to feel that. But maybe I made a mistake. I’m worried. I feel hopeless and powerless. The whole world feels awful.” 

Now you are really starting to get the idea of all the thoughts you are believing, maybe some ideas from the past, some old wounds, that are creating your experience. 

Your body is a gift in the way it expresses vibrationally the thoughts you believe are true with emotional intensity. It gives you consious mind the opportunity to perform an intervention. 

Notice where your focus is obsessing. Is it any wonder you’re experiencing what you are experiencing? 

As you build your awareness muscles, you will find that you assume the truth of a lot of things. I’m not saying you should, or shouldn’t or that those are bad, good, false or true things. 

I’m saying they are wildly creative. If you are feeling really awful as a result, in general that’s a wake up call to change your internal models of the world. It’s time to change your focus onto what would be wonderful, and to recalibrate your mind, emotions and body on what would be good for you. 

Wherever you go there you are. Feel gratitude for the challenge with your teenager, as it’s helping you realize the power to create a better reality is in you. 

When you work with me, you will learn many other tools of awareness that will help you understand your teenager (for example), and yourself and others in ways that will build compassion, forgiveness, and create opportunity for loving change. 

But it starts with awareness right now. So get started, right now! 


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“Awareness is a neurologically advanced state where you are engaging both your conscious and unconscious minds simultaneously”John Asseraf – Founder of Neurogym
Awareness creates opportunities that can’t exist without it. It is more than thinking out of the box, it’s revealing the box isn’t even there in the way you thought it was. Matt Corlett