We don't get what we wish for; we get what we are conscious of being
You might have heard a variation of the expression: You receive in proportion to what you GIVE. It even appears in some Laws of Manifestation books as the Law of Compensation for example.
But… Are you an ‘Over-Giver’? Someone who is always giving, giving, giving but feeling like… you just DO NOT receive in commensurate value? Want to end that?
I was recently in a mastermind discussing the power of giving, which morphed into a heated talk about ‘receiving’ and how to ‘get’. It’s interesting to be in a room about giving, and then ‘giving’ becomes a means that is tested by what it ‘gets’ you.
The mood had shifted, and some were feeling sad, angry and anxious about the receiving side of giving. It was as if giving was being QUESTIONED as a means of receiving (which it is).
The speakers who were in a place of doubt about giving due to experiences of NOT RECEIVING were missing something.
They were missing what they were REALLY GIVING. What do I mean by that?
it's not the word, not the deed, but the spirit behind it. that is what you get.
Someone kicked it off with a vulnerable share – “but in my past I used to give and give and give and I was left empty, and I was taken advantage of”.
I think most of us can relate to that feeling. I know I can. It tugged my heart. And in that tug, a self image flashed before me.
Sometimes you see this at the end of a relationship “I gave you EVERYTHING, but it was never enough!!!” or something worse like, “You just used me and abandoned me like I was nothing!”
Over giving is different than giving in that the over-giver is not usually in a self-loving state of consciousness. Generally the opposite is true.
The over-giver that feels empty and neglected when they don’t receive, did not ‘finish’ that way, they started that way. As within, so without. Hard pill to swallow, but good medicine.
Generally in over-giving, we started with a self-image of: “I’m unloved and not good enough. I’m not worthy of being loved or even liked. The only thing I can do is compensate for lacking by giving everything in hopes that someone will finally show me love, or at least acceptance.”
And no matter how much we give from a state of being like that, we only receive more of the same: being unloved, unworthy, and not good enough.
What seems like imbalanced returns is in reality perfect returns. For it’s not what we give that we are giving, it’s the state of consciousness from which we give that we are giving.
We attract what we are conscious of being: unworthy, unloved, not enough. So no matter how much we give, “it’s never enough”.
You are always giving, always contributing. You are contributing your state of being.
The gift we give is our state of being and we are ALWAYS giving. The ‘universe’ always provides balanced returns.
The beauty of it is, the pain that might bring in our experience is in itself a wonderful thing to receive.
It’s an opportunity to question fundamental beliefs we are holding about ourselves. To change the habits of mind that create that pain. To connect with a greater sense of our own being, value, joy, worthiness. And to TRANSFORM NOW!
And when we give from a state of being of care, love, concern, support in a state of feeling wonderful about our ability to give, our worthiness to be here now as abundant creators of life, we give that state of consciousness and the universe reflects it back to us.
When we give, we receive the awareness of our state of being in our giving. And that is always a gift for us to receive.